Recently, the most common question I have been asked is “So, when are you getting married?”
Makes sense considering I (um, we) just got engaged right?
Well the funny thing is that this is actually a very loaded question right now. Do we have a small ‘legal’ wedding and then do a bigger wedding? But if we do a smaller wedding would we bother doing a bigger wedding? If we have a smaller wedding, where and when do we have it? And who can come? Even if we wanted to make it small, my immediate family is in Dubai while my fiancé’s stretches all the way down the Eastern seaboard of the United States.
We have considered everything from India to Vegas and truly the mind boggles at all the options.
Most engaged expats will be familiar with this dilemma. In fact, most of our friends and family have chosen to do the small wedding followed by a bigger ‘blessing ceremony’ and it seems strange that two weddings are now more common that one. A quick, legal wedding can make things a whole lot easier with visas and living situations when living abroad. The paperwork is all done and anything official can be simply be covered by checking the ‘Married’ box as opposed to the ‘Single’ box.
However, it can take the romance out of the whole thing a little bit. I have found myself doing more research on visa options and how to get past the red tape than I have dreaming over flowers, wedding dresses and idyllic venues. I know, poor me right? 🙂
At the moment we are going through this rigmarole and it’s an ongoing process of weighing costs, logistics and oh yeah, what we actually want! We’re working through it one step at a time but my one piece of advice is to stay true to what you and your fiancé really want, both respectively and together. Although a quickfire wedding in Vegas seemed like the perfect solution to all our visa issues, not having my family there would be way too hard for me in reality so I had to be very honest with myself and Patrick (let’s face it, I would’ve got really angry if he got stuck on a lucky streak at the Poker table on our wedding night!).
Let’s be honest, no matter how much we convince ourselves it’s just getting married, it is still your wedding day. Although it is merely signing a piece of paper this is the day you commit to spending the rest of your life with that person and that is a pretty big deal. At this point all I know is that I would like to mark what is ultimately one of the most memorable moments that a couple can share together in a way that speaks to how important this day is – whether it’s going for a romantic getaway after the church just the two of you, sharing a special dinner in a fancy restaurant with your nearest and dearest or going for a big blow out with all your friends. I’ve decided a special day deserves a special celebration.
So if you have gone or are going through the expat wedding dilemma – I feel you! I hope you find a way to make it yours. I can’t wait to fill you in on what we come up with.
For more awesome blogs by Amy please click here *Amy’s Story*. 🙂